Jounrey to the centre of the earth 3D

By Robbie Collin

GAH. Looks like Hollywood now can’t be as*ed—sorry, ar*ed—sorting out American spellings for UK film releases.

Case in point: Journey to the CENTER Of The Earth 3D. A teeth-gnashing error on the sides of buses up and down the country, for which someone deserves to be smacked with an aluminium bat (that’s A-L-U-M-I-N-I-U-M).

So, for crimes against English, I was up for giving this effects-driven family romp a good kicking. But sadly I can’t. Cos as long as you’re watching in 3D, it’s actually OK. Center isn’t really a film—more a 90- minute fairground ride—but it does what it does pretty well.

As required by EU regulations on children’s action films, there’s a T-Rex chase and a runaway minecart bit. But the best scene involves a dramatic ocean voyage that delivers plenty of effective yet child-friendly thrills.

Unlike Beowulf, Center doesn’t marry the visuals with a decent storyline. You’ll never want to watch it more than once. And if you can’t see it in 3D, don’t bother.

But as a rainy-day family outing, this ticks all the boxes. Plus, you don’t just get Brendan Fraser gurning like an angered chimp but Brendan Fraser gurning like an angered chimp less than 4ft from your face. GREAT.